Monthly Archives: August 2012

Movie Review: Joker (2012)

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0.5 Stars (out of 4)

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Have you ever listened to a four-year-old girl tell a story? They usually sound something like this: “There once was a princess who flew to the moon, and then they ate cake, but she was really a donkey, and her dad was a mailman. The end.” That four-year-old girl’s story has better continuity than Joker.

Scientist Agastya (Akshay Kumar) is in danger of losing his research funding after his experimental device fails to make contact with extraterrestrials. He’s given one month to complete the project when his girlfriend, Diva (Sonakshi Sinha), informs Agastya that his brother called. His father is sick, and Agastya must return to India at once.

In India, Diva learns why Agastya kept his family a secret: he comes from a village whose population descended from patients who escaped from an insane asylum. Everyone in Paglapur is wacky, including Agastya’s brother, Babban (Shreyas Talpade), who speaks only in gibberish. (The film doesn’t bother to explain how gibberish-speaking Babban was able to communicate the message about Agastya’s sick father over the phone to Diva.)

Eventually the truth comes out: Agastya’s dad isn’t really sick. The local river has been dammed, and the villagers need Agastya’s help to get the dam removed so they can water their crops.

Unfortunately, the village was left off the survey maps created in the 1940s, and none of the regional bureaucrats want to claim jurisdiction over Paglapur. One of the bureaucrats compares the village to the joker in a deck of cards: it exists, but it doesn’t belong to any of the suits (or, in Paglapur’s case, states).

I think the bureaucrat’s explanation is where the movie lost me for good. What a dumb justification for a movie title. It’s not a great analogy in the first place, and the title is meant to prey on moviegoers’ mental shortcuts. “I think Akshay Kumar is funny, and a joker is someone who is funny, so Joker must be another funny Akshay Kumar movie. Take my money, please!”

The surprise for those unfortunate moviegoers is that Kumar plays the straight man in Joker. He spends an uncharacteristically small amount of time running around and screaming, compared to many of his recent roles. Not only is Kumar himself not funny, neither is the rest of the cast.

Babban’s ceaseless gibberish is particularly grating. It’s the most annoying vocal tic I’ve heard since that character in Golmaal Returns who speaks only in vowels.

All the wacky character tics — the guy who thinks he’s a king, the guy dressed like a centurion, the kid who thinks he’s a lamp — are cover for an inane plot that seems like it’s being made up as it goes along. Events happen with no consideration for how to get from Point A to Point B. Director Shirish Kunder just has everyone act nuts to distract the audience from the radical shifts in the plot.

There’s a mystery that runs throughout Joker: where are all the women? There’s not a single female villager in Paglapur — apart from Diva, who has little to do in the film besides look bemused — yet ladies materialize from nowhere whenever a song-and-dance number starts. The absence of estrogen in town may explain why Babban falls for the first woman he sees, a news reporter played by Minissha Lamba, in one of the most underused cameos I’ve ever seen.

So, what are the positives about Joker? Chitrangda Singh looks gorgeous in the item number “Kaafirana.” Agastya’s American nemesis, Simon (Alexx O’Nell), has a magnificent head of curly red hair. Joker‘s runtime is mercifully short, at just about 100 minutes. Those probably aren’t good enough reasons to spend $10 on a movie ticket.

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Opening August 31: Joker

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Another new Hindi movie opens in Chicago area theaters the weekend beginning August 31, 2012. Joker stars Akshay Kumar and Sonakshi Sinha in a comedy about aliens, not that you’d be able to infer that from the title.

Joker opens on Friday at the Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles, AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington, and Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville. Joker‘s runtime is listed as 2 hrs. 30 min. at AMC’s website but is reported to be closer to 1 hrs. 40 min.

Last weekend’s new release, Shirin Farhad Ki Toh Nikal Padi, carries over for a second week at the South Barrington 30 and Cantera 17. Ek Tha Tiger, which has earned $2,347,774 in its first two weeks in U.S. theaters, gets a third week at all three of the above theaters.

Other Indian movies showing at the Golf Glen 5 this weekend include Kevi Rite Jaish (Gujarati), Mr. Marumakan (Malayalam), Mugamoodi (Tamil), Simhasanam (Malayalam), Srimannaraya (Telugu), and Sudigadu (Telugu).

The Chicago South Asian Film Festival announced the lineup of films for this year’s festival, which runs from September 20-23. The fest kicks off with a gala showing of Heroine and closes with the world premiere of Shobhna’s Seven Nights, starring Raveena Tandon, Lillete Dubey, and Anupam Kher.

Movie Review: Shirin Farhad Ki Toh Nikal Padi (2012)

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3 Stars (out of 4)

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This will come as a shock to many moviegoers (and moviemakers): rich, attractive twentysomethings aren’t the only people who fall in love. Shirin Farhad Ki Toh Nikal Padi (“Shirin and Farhad Made It”) bucks conventional romantic comedy protocol to tell a love story about a pair of awkward fortysomethings who fall in love for the first time.

Boman Irani plays Farhad Pastakia, a nice guy who has never been able to find the right girl. Farhad’s lack of romantic success is partially due to his shyness, but his main problem is that he sells women’s underwear for a living.

Farhad’s career is inevitably the deal-breaker in meetings with the families of prospective brides arranged by his well-meaning mother, Nargis (Daisy Irani), and his busy-body aunt, Beroze. His job certainly doesn’t help him at the matrimonial mixers staged by the local Parsi community.

The Parsi community is almost a character in its own right in the film. Every meeting or mixer organized by the Parsis (an Indian community who practice Zoroastrianism) descends into a brawl. The scenes are silly but give a sense of the social obstacles preventing Farhad from meeting a nice Parsi girl.

One of the committee members trying to keep the Parsis from killing each other is Shirin Fugawala (Farah Khan). She and Farhad meet initially at his underwear shop, and they hit it off later at a Parsi mixer. Little does Farhad know that Shirin is the committee member who ordered the destruction of an illegal water tank in Farhad’s mother’s kitchen. When Nargis realizes that her son has fallen for her sworn enemy, she forbids Farhad from marrying Shirin.

The source of the conflict is kind of weak, although it is funny that Nargis holds such a grudge over being caught doing something illegal. She’s emotionally invested in the water tank, which serves as a reminder of her late husband. Farhad’s grandmother, who lives with Farhad and Nargis, isn’t about to let something so trivial stand in the way of her grandson’s happiness.

Boman Irani is always entertaining. Though he primarily works in Bollywood as a supporting character actor, his versatility allows him to give nice-guy Farhad both vulnerability and playfulness. Irani is charming and performs to his usual high standards.

Farah Khan is likewise an unconventional choice for a lead actress. Best known as a director and choreographer, Khan usually plays herself in front of the camera. Khan is great as Shirin, a woman who isn’t single because of any flaws, but because she has more important priorities than marriage. Shirin gets along so well with Farhad initially because she’s under no pressure; she’s sure the relationship isn’t going anywhere.

Overall, the film is more amusing than laugh-out-loud funny, though there are a few great lines. Early on, a well-meaning aunt tries to find a date for Shirin, and each bachelor in her stack of photos is older than the next. The aunt points to a picture of one old-timer and says, “He’s young at heart. He just underwent a bypass.”

Links

  • Shirin Farhad Ki Toh Nikal Padi at Wikipedia
  • Shirin Farhad Ki Toh Nikal Padi at IMDb

Opening August 24: Shirin Farhad Ki Toh Nikal Padi

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It’s an exciting weekend for Boman Irani fans like myself. The romantic comedy Shirin Farhad Ki Toh Nikal Padi opens in three Chicago area theaters on August 24, 2012. (Question for Hindi speakers: what does the title translate to in English? Update: The English subtitled lyrics for the title track are translated as “Shirin-Farhad Made It.”)

SFKTNP opens on Friday at the Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles, AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington, and Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville. It has a runtime of 1 hr. 52 min. You can read my review here.

After earning an impressive $1,484,404 in its first five days in U.S. theaters, Ek Tha Tiger carries over for a second week at all of the above theaters and the Regal Gardens Stadium 1-6 in Skokie.

Another cool opportunity for Chicago area Hindi film fans this weekend is the chance to participate in a Q&A with the director of Patang, Prashant Bhargava. Mr. Bhargava is hosting several question and answer sessions following showings of Patang at Facets Cinematheque in Chicago.

Other Indian movies playing at the Golf Glen 5 this weekend include Julayi (Telugu), Mr. Marumakan (Malayalam), and Sudigadu (Telugu).

One recently released trailer of note is for the comedy OMG Oh My God, which opens September 28:

Movie Review: Hate Story (2012)

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1 Star (out of 4)

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Hate Story is a distressing allegory about revenge. In an attempt to create an erotic thriller with an empowered female lead character, writer-producer Vikram Bhatt instead reinforces a belief system that blames women for the sexual violence committed against them.

The story begins as up-and-coming newspaper reporter Kaavya (Paoli Dam) is tipped off to a secret meeting between a judge and the CEO of a construction firm. The tip comes at dinnertime, and Kaavya’s mom is miffed that her adult daughter won’t be able to help set the table. That Kaavya’s parents treat her job as a cute hobby and not the profession it is indicates where Hate Story falls on the gender-equity continuum.

Kaavya breaks the bribery scandal with the help of her male photographer/best friend Vicky (Nikhil Dwivedi). The son of the construction firm’s owner, Sid (Gulshan Devaiya), offers Kaavya a job in order to keep her from reporting such stories in the future. Kaavya chucks her journalistic ethics and takes the job.

A lot of stuff happens in the first forty minutes of the film. Kaavya falls for Sid and sleeps with him, only to learn that the job and romance were a ruse. Sid fires Kaavya, shoves her to the ground, and points a gun at her, telling her, “I fuck the people who fuck with me.” Kaavya learns that she’s pregnant and tells Sid she’ll get half his money anyway. So he has her kidnapped and taken to an illicit country clinic for an abortion. For good measure, Sid has the doctor permanently sterilize her.

Kaavya’s natural response to this horrific violation is to want revenge. Gelding Sid seems like the most equivalent form of retribution, but it’s never mentioned. Neither is murder. Instead, Kaavya wants to ruin Sid’s business. Somehow, that doesn’t seem comparable to being raped, impregnated, and forcibly sterilized.

Even stupider is Kaavya’s plan to ruin Sid by becoming Delhi’s most sought-after prostitute. Wouldn’t her skills as a journalist be more valuable than her ability to turn tricks? Given that she directly tells a couple of male characters, “I’m sleeping with you to get info to use against Sid,” only for them to have sex with her and give her the info anyway, maybe it’s not such a dumb plan after all.

What the plan highlights is the appalling idea that a woman who’s been sexually assaulted is damaged goods, only useful for yet more sexual acts. Bhatt tries to write a few lines to explain that this was Kaavya’s choice, but I don’t buy it. First of all, the plot moves along too quickly for any meaningful character development that could explain Kaavya’s abrupt transition from innocent young woman to jaded sex worker.

More importantly, Kaavya doesn’t have any other options. After nearly dying as a result of the forced abortion, her parents disown her and leave town to avoid their gossipy neighbors. Even Vicky blames Kaavya for the rape, since she did fall in love with Sid. Vicky, who loves Kaavya, never offers to marry her and build a new life with her.

The theme of Hate Story is that revenge is a dangerous game, but the counterpart of revenge is justice. There’s never any mention of Sid going to jail for his crimes against Kaavya, and no one pursues justice on her behalf. If revenge isn’t an option either, how is Kaavya supposed to respond to her sexual assault? I’d like to know Vikram Bhatt’s response.

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Movie Review: Ek Tha Tiger (2012)

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2.5 Stars (out of 4)

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If you’ve seen one Salman Khan film, you’ve seen them all. Ek Tha Tiger (“There Once Was a Tiger”) is more polished than most of Khan’s films, but it still feels like something I’ve seen a dozen times before.

To put Khan in context for American moviegoers, he’s something like an Indian Steven Seagal. Whether Seagal stars in Hard to Kill, Under Siege, or Above the Law, it’s impossible to think of the characters as having their own individual identities: they are always, unmistakably Steven Seagal. Khan is the same way, playing the same macho action hero in all of his films from at least the last five years.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Khan was hilarious in Dabangg, a film that embraced his typical character and took it to the extreme for great comic effect. But the limitations of the “Khan” character make it hard to be surprised by any of his movies. Ek Tha Tiger is no different, despite having the expertise and lavish budget of a powerful production house like Yash Raj Films.

Khan plays Tiger, a spy employed by RAW, India’s version of the CIA. Using his superhuman wits and strength, Tiger outsmarts the agents of Pakistan’s equivalent spy agency, ISI. Tiger’s devotion to duty means that he has never had time for love, even though all of the women in his neighborhood swoon at the sight of him. He dresses like a dork and has trouble talking to women, in particular a lovely young woman named Zoya (Katrina Kaif).

Zoya is a student at Dublin’s Trinity College and a part-time assistant to an eccentric professor. RAW suspects the professor of unwittingly giving information about India’s missile defense systems to an ISI agent, and Tiger is sent to Dublin to investigate the professor’s contacts. Tiger woos Zoya as part of his mission and accidentally falls in love with her in the process.

The first half of the film feels a lot like last year’s Bodyguard, although Ek Tha Tiger isn’t as cheesy. The second half of the film raises some interesting themes, as Tiger questions whether his duty is worth sacrificing his personal happiness, especially when he suspects that the enmity between RAW and ISI may actually be keeping India and Pakistan from resolving their differences peacefully.

If you’ve never seen a Salman Khan film before, Ek Tha Tiger is a decent introduction. The production values are high, despite some shoddy CGI and an obvious instance of Khan’s face being Photoshopped on to his stunt double’s body during the opening action scene. The locations — Dublin, Istanbul, and Havana — are interesting and beautifully shot. Given American embargoes against travel to Cuba, I found the Havana scenes particularly novel.

While the incidental music in Ek Tha Tiger is sometimes corny, most of the songs in the film are pretty good. The best number, “Mashallah,” plays during the closing credits, so don’t leave the theater early.

The supporting cast is also decent. Kaif’s performance is solid, although her character is responsible for staging the worst play ever, which features a ridiculous bastardization of Pinocchio‘s “I’ve Got No Strings.” Ranvir Shorey is very good as Tiger’s best friend and fellow agent, Gopi.

As always, Salman Khan is Salman Khan. Fans of his films will find Ek Tha Tiger right in their wheelhouse. If, like me, you aren’t completely charmed by his superhuman heroics and occasional topless shots, Ek Tha Tiger is probably best reserved for DVD. It’s not a bad movie. It’s just nothing new.

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Opening August 15: Ek Tha Tiger

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Salman Khan’s Ek Tha Tiger roars its way into theaters on Wednesday, August 15, 2012. The pairing of Salman and co-star Katrina Kaif with the legendary production house Yash Raj Films guarantees that Ek Tha Tiger will do blockbuster business. To avoid the competition, no new Hindi films are being released until Friday, August 24. Additionally, Chicago area theaters are clearing their screens of all other Bollywood titles to make way for the Tiger.

Ek Tha Tiger opens on Wednesday in four Chicagoland theaters: Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles, Regal Gardens Stadium 1-6 in Skokie, AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington, and Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville. Click here for a national theater listing. The film has a runtime of 2 hrs. 13 min.

Other Indian movies showing at the Golf Glen 5 through the weekend include the Telugu films Andala Rakshasi, Devudu Chesina Manushulu, and Julayi.

In Theaters August 10, 2012

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With the guaranteed blockbuster Ek Tha Tiger set to open next Wednesday, there are no new Hindi movies opening in Chicago area theaters on Friday, August 10. However, the options that remain are pretty good.

The inept yet deliriously fun Jism 2 carries over for a second week at the Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles and AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington. The South Barrington 30 also carries over the compelling romantic drama Cocktail for a fifth week. Last weekend’s largely unheralded new release, Yeh Jo Mohabbat Hai, gets another week at the Golf Glen 5.

Other Indian movies playing at the Golf Glen 5 this weekend include Andala Rakshasi (Telugu), Julayi (Telugu), Mirattal (Tamil), and Vaadhyar (Malayalam).

The trailers for two October 5, 2012, releases went public today. Preity Zinta’s Ishkq in Paris:

… and Vivek Oberoi’s Kismet Love Paisa Dilli:

Some other noteworthy trailers released recently include those for Raaz 3 (opening September 7):

… and Student of the Year (October 19):

Movie Review: Jism 2 (2012)

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2 Stars (out of 4)

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Jism 2: To Love Her is to Die is simultaneously ridiculous and wildly entertaining. The “sequel” is related to 2003’s Jism (“Body”) in name only.

The film’s main gimmick is that director Pooja Bhatt cast Canadian porn actress Sunny Leone in the lead role, Leone’s first outside of the adult film industry. Jism 2‘s opening lines, spoken by Leone (actually, by the actress who dubbed Leone’s Hindi dialog), are: “My name is Izna. I’m a porn star.”

This revelation has no bearing on the plot. The only indications that she’s a porn star are her penchants for pale pink lip gloss and platform heels. I suspect the profession is mentioned to condone the fact that Izna has sex with both male leads. Would that behavior have been unacceptable had Izna been a doctor or a bank teller?

Izna is recruited by an unspecified government agency to seduce her ex-boyfriend, Kabir (Randeep Hooda), a former intelligence officer turned terrorist. He has “data” the agency wants. Don’t expect satisfying answers about what the data is, the nature of the agency, or why Kabir went rogue.

Izna finds herself in a sticky situation when the agency officer who recruited her, Ayaan (Arunoday Singh), falls for her. Will she be able to betray her former flame, even though he still carries a torch for her?

Leone exceeds expectations by not being terrible. The spunky newcomer is undeniably gorgeous, and she makes a determined effort to convey Izna’s conflicted emotions. However, her acting is overshadowed by her heaving bosom. Leone’s lips are parted in all scenes except for those showing her sleeping, her mouth-breathing allowing her to achieve perpetual breathlessness and maximum breast movement.

Hooda likewise tries really hard to make Kabir mysterious and sexy. This performance should establish Hooda as Bollywood’s go-to actor for smoldering intensity. Given the volume of Leone’s cleavage on display, there aren’t nearly enough shots of Hooda shirtless on balance.

Compared to the performances of his costars, Singh appears in most scenes to have been recently roused from a nap. While Leone heaves her little heart out, Singh just stands there, delivering his lines limply.

I think it’s time to have a discussion as to whether or not Arunoday Singh is leading-man material. He’s not a great actor, and his high-pitched voice doesn’t match his beefy frame. Yes, he’s tall and muscular, but he’s not handsome, no matter how often the female characters in movies such as Aisha insist that he is. He’d make a fine villain or bodyguard/sidekick, but cast alongside a hunk like Randeep Hooda, Singh gets blown out of the water.

The height differential between Singh and Hooda presents continuity problems in Jism, 2 as Leone is forced to change footwear mid-scene, depending which actor she’s paired with. She wears heels as she leaves the towering Singh for a jungle meeting with the much shorter Hooda and emerges from the underbrush wearing flats.

How did this jungle meeting come about, you wonder. Izna invites Kabir to discuss their unresolved feelings in person via a truly hilarious text message: “Meet me in the jungle next to the highway.” An ideal spot to rekindle a romance! I wanted Kabir to show up late, apologizing: “I went to the forest next to the turnpike by mistake.”

The text message exemplifies the most unintentionally funny aspect of Jism 2: Izna is a terrible seductress. In a flashback to her initial meeting with Kabir years earlier — the scene isn’t introduced as a flashback, so for a time I wondered why the former lovers didn’t recognize one another — Izna falls in love with Kabir after he lets her off the hook for a crime. She expresses her feelings to him in a love letter written in her own blood!

Somehow, Izna’s batshit crazy overture works. Kabir repeatedly sniffs the letter, as if inhaling her perfume: AB+.

Even the romance scenes veer into creepy territory. Both of the guys sneak into Izna’s bedroom and spy on her while she sleeps, clad in uncomfortable-looking lingerie. Liplocks routinely end with the kissers joined by strings of spittle. Leone writhes and arches her back like a champ, but shots of Kabir sucking on Izna’s toes are just gross.

Just for the sheer craziness of it all, I think I’m recommending Jism 2 as a must-see. It’s not good, but it’s certainly entertaining in spurts.

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Opening August 3: Jism 2 and Yeh Jo Mohabbat Hai

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Another new Hindi sequel opens in the Chicago area on August 3, 2012. Jism 2 isn’t a direct follow-up to the 2003 erotic thriller Jism and features new characters played by Randeep Hooda and Sunny Leone. Given that “jism” (Hindi for “body”) is a crude slang term in English, I will ask for my ticket using the film’s subtitle: To Love Her is to Die.

Jism 2: To Love Her is to Die opens on Friday at the Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles and AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington. It has a runtime of 2 hrs. 12 min. Read my review here.

Also new at the Golf Glen 5 on Friday is the romantic drama Yeh Jo Mohabbat Hai.

The comedy Kya Super Kool Hain Hum carries over for a second week at both of the above theaters and the Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville. The South Barrington 30 is also holding over Cocktail and Bol Bachchan.

Other Indian movies showing at the Golf Glen 5 this weekend include Mirattal (Tamil), Uu Kodathara? Ulikki Padathara? (Telugu), and Vaadhyar (Malayalam).