In Theaters: January 3, 2014

With Dhoom 3 on such a roll, there are no new Hindi movies opening in the Chicago area on January 3, 2014. By December 29, Dhoom 3 had already earned $6,817,935 in North America, and it’s on pace to earn more than $8 million here.

Dhoom 3 carries over for a third weekend in six local theaters: AMC River East 21 in Chicago, Regal Gardens Stadium 1-6 in Skokie, Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles, AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington, AMC Loews Woodridge 18 in Woodridge, and Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville.

Starting on Friday, the Golf Glen 5 will also carry Biriyani (Tamil), D for Dopidi (Telugu), and Drishyam (Malayalam).

Worst Bollywood Movies of 2013

This is the sixth “worst movies of the year” post I’ve written, and every year the worst movies share the same problems: bad plot construction, unintentionally unlikable protagonists, and the reprehensible treatment of female characters. (Click on the title of each movie to read my original review.)

Most of this year’s crop of bad movies have the standard problems, but I give credit to Zila Ghaziabad for making it onto the list for a whole new reason: failure to appreciate the strength of the Censor Board’s opposition to smoking.

While all Indian filmmakers know that scenes in which a character smokes are likely to be tagged with an onscreen warning that reads, “Cigarette smoking is injurious to health,” director Anand Kumar refused to capitulate in Zila Ghaziabad. As a result, the warning appears onscreen for nearly half of the movie. It’s so distracting that I’m almost convinced it was deliberate and that the whole movie is Kumar’s dig at the Censor Board.

Among movies that stunk in more conventional fashion, Bajatey Raho, Bullett Raja, and Fukrey were full of plot holes that never should’ve made it out of a first draft, let alone into a finished project. Fukrey wins bonus points for a racist scene in which a character refers to a group of black bodyguards as the “Chicago Bulls.”

I, Me aur Main and Ramaiya Vastavaiya were hampered by really, really unlikeable lead characters. Not to be outdone, Grand Masti featured not one, but three total jerks in leading roles. I’m awarding bonus points to Grand Masti for racism, sexism, and making a joke about gang rape.

Grand Masti wasn’t the only movie to try to make light of rape or treat it as a plot device. The threat of rape was used to provoke the male leads in R… Rajkumar and Himmatwala. Both movies try to make that case that a woman’s only defense against rape is a strong male family member or boyfriend.

As patronizing as that idea is, it’s still not as abhorrent as the violently sexist message of my worst film of 2013: 3G. This poorly written horror movie cites pornography as the primary reason romantic relationships fail, but never suggests that the problem lies with those who view porn. Instead, it explicitly blames the women who perform in porn (and implicitly blames any woman with a sex drive). Want to get rid of porn? Kill all the porn stars!

At the same time that the movie blames sexually active women for provoking the violence committed against them, directors Shantanu & Sheershak go out of their way to portray actress Sonal Chauhan as a sex object. The camera ogles her breasts and buttocks while she writhes around on the beach and on a kitchen island (something I’m guessing she doesn’t do for fun when she’s at home alone).

Shantanu & Sheershak fail to recognize their own hypocrisy. Who’s more responsible for Chauhan’s depiction as a sex object: Chauhan — a paid performer — or the men who told her what to do and how to pose, filmed her, paid her, and then counted on others to pay to watch what they filmed?

Worst Bollywood Movies of 2013

  1. 3G — Buy at Amazon
  2. Grand Masti — Buy at Amazon
  3. Himmatwala — Buy/rent at Amazon or iTunes
  4. Fukrey — Buy/rent at Amazon or iTunes
  5. Bullett Raja — Buy at Amazon
  6. R… Rajkumar — Buy/rent at Amazon or iTunes
  7. Ramaiya Vastavaiya — Buy/rent at Amazon or iTunes
  8. Zila Ghaziabad — Buy at Amazon
  9. I, Me aur Main — Buy at Amazon
  10. Bajatey Raho — Buy at Amazon

Previous Worst Movies Lists

Streaming Video News: December 24, 2013

In celebration of Christmas, Eros Now has made a number of its premium titles available for streaming for free when you sign up for a trial subscription. Those titles include flicks from 2013, such as Lootera, Madras Cafe, Ek Thi Daayan, Grand Masti, Raanjhanaa, and — (cue the fanfare) — Krrish 3! If you’ve been waiting to check out the service, this is the perfect time to give it a try.

Eros Now also recently added Inkaar, which I’m eager to watch since it didn’t open in the U.S. It’s not included with the free trial, but Arjun Rampal and Chitrangada Singh are hot enough that I can be swayed to shell out $7.99 for a month’s subscription.

Merry Christmas!

Movie Review: Dhoom 3 (2013)

Dhoom_3_Film_Poster3 Stars (out of 4)

Buy or rent the movie at iTunes
Buy the DVD at Amazon
Buy the soundtrack at Amazon

There’s something liberating about a movie that makes it clear that it’s not supposed to be taken seriously. When concepts like physics and geography are chucked out the window with abandon, the audience has no choice but to accept the world as presented and go with it. Dhoom 3 is just such a movie: ridiculous and thoroughly enjoyable.

Dhoom 3 finds Mumbai police officers Jai (Abhishek Bachchan) and Ali (Uday Chopra) in Chicago to assist the police investigation of a bank robber who leaves messages in Hindi at every crime scene. Apparently, there are no CCTV cameras in the city, because the local police are unable to identify the brazen perpetrator: Sahir (Aamir Khan), a magician with a grudge against the bank.

Jai spearheads the investigation because Ali is too infatuated with their lovely local police contact, Victoria (Tabrett Brethell), to concentrate. Victoria’s only real purpose in the movie is to appear in funny dream sequences in which Ali seduces her while surrounded by their four imaginary future children.

During the course of the investigation, Sahir revives his father’s Great Indian Circus, a stage show featuring dancers, acrobats, and magicians. His star performer is Aaliya (Katrina Kaif), whom we know is supposed to be a free spirit because of her penchant for wearing floppy hats and overalls. Like Victoria, Aaliya has little to do apart from looking sexy during performances.

The movie’s action-packed first half features a couple of great-looking chase scenes through downtown Chicago, including a race along the Chicago River that sees the return of the submersible jet ski from Dhoom 2 (physics, be damned)! The second half becomes a personal drama that reveals how Sahir has been able to pull off his heists, that — as tonally incongruous as it is — still works because Aamir Khan is so darned talented.

Because I live about thirty miles from Chicago, I’ve really been looking forward to Dhoom 3. Evidently, so had everyone else in the theater, because everyone let out a cheer when “Chicago 1990” appeared on screen at the start of the film. As a local, here’s what stood out to me:

  • Dhoom 3‘s sense of geography is hilarious. I pity the poor tourist who comes to flat Chicago expecting to see the mountains Jai stares at out of his lakefront penthouse window. Also, good luck trying to make the motorcycle ride from Chicago to the Verzasca Dam in Switzerland.
  • One place that likely will see an uptick in movie-related tourism is Six Flags Great America. Not only are a number of scenes shot there, but the characters discuss the merits of its various roller coasters by name.
  • The movie is full of product placement — Mountain Dew, BMW, etc. — but there’s one corporation that apparently wouldn’t sign off on appearing in the movie: Dunkin’ Donuts. Their stores are EVERYWHERE in downtown Chicago, but you never see any on screen, a feat that seems impossible to accomplish by accident.
  • The accents of all the Chicago characters are whack. This is a Chicago accent.

Minor quibbles aside, Dhoom 3 did right by Chicago. Near the end of the film is a shot of what I think is the single most beautiful sight in the world: the city of Chicago at night. I hope the movie entices a few extra people to come visit us here in the Windy City. If nothing else, Dhoom 3 is a goofy, fun way to spend three hours in the theater.

Links

Opening December 20: Dhoom 3

2013 goes out with a bang when Dhoom 3 releases on December 20.

Dhoom 3 opens on Friday in seven Chicago area theaters, several of which are devoting multiple screens to the action blockbuster: AMC River East 21 in Chicago, Regal Gardens Stadium 1-6 in Skokie, Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles, AMC Loews Crestwood 18 in Crestwood, AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington, AMC Loews Woodridge 18 in Woodridge, and Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville. It has a listed runtime of 2 hrs. 53 min. The Golf Glen 5 will also carry the Tamil-dubbed version of the film.

This weekend, the Golf Glen 5 will also carry the Tamil movies Biriyani and Endrendrum Punnagai.

New Trailer: December 17, 2013

iRock films released the trailer for their upcoming film Kill the Rapist?, set for theatrical release sometime in 2014. There’s a question mark in the title because the studio is soliciting votes from the public to determine the film’s ending. It’s a clever gimmick that taps into the widespread feelings of helplessness that stir whenever a particularly vicious rape makes headlines.

The trailer footage raises an awful lot of red flags. Nearly half of the trailer is devoted to scenes of the rapist torturing his victim. Is the movie more about the rape or the victim’s revenge? I get very little vicarious satisfaction from revenge movies, anyway, but I have no interest in watching a film that makes a spectacle out of a heinous crime. Maybe a future trailer will better define what kind of movie Kill the Rapist? really is.

New Trailers: December 16, 2013

With the new year just around the corner, there are a ton of new trailers out promoting movies scheduled for release in 2014. Let’s start with the biggest flick first: Salman Khan’s Jai Ho, opening January 24.

The trailer — like most of the trailers below — doesn’t have English subtitles, so I’m obviously missing out on the dialogue. Based on the visuals, I can’t see what differentiates this from any other recent Salman Khan film. I find Salman charming, but I’m tired of watching him play the same part: a morally perfect, invincible hero whose only character flaw is that he doesn’t have a girlfriend at the start of the movie. I want to see Salman play a character with room for growth: a washed up boxer who takes to the ring for one last fight, even though it might kill him; an upright family man who risks his reputation to save his wife and kids; an undercover cop whose constant lion-roaring threatens to blow his cover.

Next up is the romantic comedy Hasee Toh Phasee, releasing on February 7. Parineeti Chopra is terrific, so I’m looking forward to this.

The excellent costumes look like reason enough to see Gunday when it comes out on February 14.

Check out the gorgeous scenery in director Imtiaz Ali’s Highway, opening February 21.

 

In Theaters: December 13, 2013

Faced with last week’s release of R… Rajkumar and next Friday’s release of Dhoom 3, distributors have elected not to open any new Hindi movies in the Chicago area on Friday, December 13, 2013. This may be a good thing, since my friend Keyur Seta at The Common Man Speaks writes to me that the new movie Lucky Kabootar is, “Easily one of the worst films I have ever seen.” Still, I’m a little bummed I won’t get to see Jackpot, the newest movie from Kaizad Gustad, mastermind behind the unintentionally hilarious Boom.

The only Bollywood films carrying over in theaters this weekend are R… Rajkumar — at the Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles, AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington, and Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville — and Goliyon Ki Raasleela Ram-Leela, at the South Barrington 30. Ram-Leela‘s total U.S. earnings in its first four weeks stand at $2,674,134.

Eros International has to be disappointed by R… Rajkumar‘s opening weekend U.S. box office performance. It collected $124,669 from 91 screens. That’s worse than Singh Saab the Great‘s opening weekend totals of $138,127 just three weeks earlier, and that film only opened on 37 fewer screens. R… Rajkumar‘s opening weekend totals were less than half of what Shahid Kapoor’s Phata Poster Nikla Hero opened to — $260,188 from 94 screens — back in September.

Other Indian movies showing at the Golf Glen 5 this weekend include the Tamil films Ivan Veramathiri and Kalyana Samayal Saadham, Philips and the Monkey Pen (Malayalam), and the Telugu flicks Second Hand and Venkatadri Express.

Movie Review: R… Rajkumar (2013)

R..._Rajkumar_Theatrical_poster_(2013)1 Star (out of 4)

Buy or rent the movie at iTunes
Buy the DVD at Amazon
Buy the soundtrack at Amazon

Director Prabhu Deva’s schizophrenic style strikes again. In R… Rajkumar, he derails an enjoyable action rom-com with a casual treatment of violence against women.

The double shame is that the character who suffers most from this misogyny, Chanda (Sonakshi Sinha), is a strong female character. Yet the script reduces her to a plot device, beaten and threatened with rape just to inspire the heroic deeds of the title character, Romeo Rajkumar (Shahid Kapoor).

Romeo, a hired thug, comes to town to join a gang headed by Shivraj (Sonu Sood), a drug lord at war with a rival opium dealer, Parmar (Ashish Vidyarthi). He falls in love with Chanda at first sight, becoming so lovestruck that it hampers his ability to carry out his duties on behalf of Shivraj.

Romeo’s love-induced impairment repeatedly endangers the life of his fellow henchmen and best friend, an apparently unnamed goon played by Mukul Dev. Their playfully antagonistic friendship is the highlight of the movie, even though it mostly disappears in the second half of the film.

The humor in Romeo’s friendship and in his pursuit of Chanda are hard to reconcile in the context of a movie that treats violence against women as a given. Chanda is brutally lashed with a belt a dozen times by her uncle, who objects to her romance with Romeo. In the very next scene, the same uncle is seen clowning around with his underlings, accompanied by a flatulence sound effect.

Is the audience supposed to ignore the beating the uncle administered to his niece just seconds earlier? Is he supposed to be a source of comic relief or a monster? It’s one thing for the uncle to abuse his underlings; they signed up for the job. Chanda is beaten because she is a woman.

In another scene, Shivraj threatens Chanda in order to provoke Romeo: “I’ll tie her up and rape her in front of you.” However, in the English subtitles, the word “rape” is censored, written as “r**e.” So rape is too vile a word to read, but not too vile an act to depict onscreen or use as a threat?

It’s so frustrating because R… Rajkumar is otherwise pretty good. Romeo and Chanda develop a sweet relationship over the course of the film. Kapoor shows a wide range in his performance, and his dancing is top-notch, as always. Sinha is brave and resolute while enduring all the abuse the script throws at her.

I wish I could recommend R… Rajkumar, but I just can’t. It portrays violence against women as a social norm, something a woman can only escape if she has a boyfriend with superhuman strength to defend her. Why couldn’t this just be a fun movie and not a regressive piece of social commentary?

Links

Opening December 6: R… Rajkumar

The action flick R… Rajkumar hits Chicago area theaters on December 6, 2013. Given that it’s directed by Prabhu Deva, if it has even a hint of plot continuity, I’m going to be impressed.

R… Rajkumar opens on Friday at the AMC River East 21 in Chicago, Big Cinemas Golf Glen 5 in Niles, AMC South Barrington 30 in South Barrington, and Regal Cantera Stadium 17 in Warrenville. It has a listed runtime of 2 hrs. 26 min.

Bullett Raja carries over for a second weekend at the Golf Glen 5, South Barrington 30, and Cantera 17, despite a weak opening weekend at the U.S. box office. Its $175,727 only beat Ram-Leela by $5,000, and Ram-Leela‘s been out for three weeks.

Since Goliyon Ki Raasleela Ram-Leela is still performing well — with total U.S. earnings standing at $2,633,885 — it gets a fourth week at the South Barrington 30 and Cantera 17.

With total U.S. earnings of $325,885 so far, Gori Tere Pyaar Mein gets a third week at the South Barrington 30.

Other Indian films showing at the Golf Glen 5 this weekend include Kalyana Samayal Saadham (Tamil), Prema Ishq Kaadhal (Telugu), Thagaraaru (Tamil), and Venkatadri Express (Telugu).