Tag Archives: 2023

Movie Review: All India Rank (2023)

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2.5 Stars (out of 4)

Watch All India Rank on Netflix

To call All India Rank a coming-of-age story about a student trying to get into a prestigious college is too simple. The story’s real protagonist is the student’s father.

All India Rank takes place in 1997. 17-year-old Vivek Singh (Bodhisattva Sharma) doesn’t have any say in the direction of his life. His dad R.K. (Shashi Bhushan) wants him to get into the Indian Institutes of Technology (IIT), so that’s what Vivek must do. Father and son travel from Lucknow to Kota, where Vivek will spend the next year at a coaching school training to take the IIT entrance exam.

Paying for Vivek to train to take a test is more expensive than immediately enrolling him in a local college, but R.K. is convinced that the family’s future financial stability hinges on Vivek getting an elite degree. The Singhs aren’t exactly rolling in money. R.K. works at the state telecom company, and mom Manju (Geeta Agrawal Sharma) runs a small shop with a pay phone. Sending Vivek to Kota is a stretch.

Vivek hardly knows why he’s at the coaching center. He has no goals of his own, and he’s far from the best student there. But he makes friends, meets a girl he likes, and gets a bit closer to discovering what he wants from life: pretty typical coming-of-age movie stuff. Vivek’s growth arc is predictable. His father’s is not.

R.K. is so invested in his plan for his only child that he hasn’t stopped to consider the wisdom of it. Nor has he considered the effect it has on Vivek and Manju. It doesn’t occur to R.K. that he and his wife are now empty nesters until she points it out to him. When both parents have work trouble that affects their income, the financial risk of sending Vivek to the coaching academy becomes apparent, too. Shashi Bhushan and Geeta Agrawal Sharma do a lovely job playing the couple, as they try to persevere through a phase of life that’s more difficult than they anticipated.

The problems faced by the parents — which also includes a sex pest who uses Manju’s pay phone to make dirty calls — are much more interesting than anything that Vivek goes through. Yet the story spends much more time with Vivek in Kota. The narrative balance feels off, and the film overall feels less ambitious than it should have been.

All India Rank is obviously made for an audience familiar with the stakes associated with taking the IIT entrance exam and the infrastructure built to support it, but that leaves the unversed on the outside looking in. The term “All India Rank” is never explained, nor are the numbers associated with the students’ test scores. I’m sure this is clear to the intended audience, but it makes it hard for outsiders to gauge Vivek’s progress.

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Best Bollywood Movies of 2023

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It’s time to bid adieu to 2023 with my Best Bollywood Movies of the year list!

First up is one of a few smaller family dramas that made my 2023 Top 10 Hindi films: Manoj Bajpayee’s Gulmohar. Filmmaker Rahul V. Chittella’s screenplay deftly introduces all of the story’s major points of conflict within the first five minutes, and the story treats LGBTQ issues with sensitivity.

Two big-budget, star-studded romances are next: Shraddha Kapoor & Ranbir Kapoor’s Tu Jhoothi Main Makkar and Alia Bhatt & Ranveer Singh’s Rocky Aur Rani Kii Prem Kahaani. I love a good spectacle with lavish dance numbers, and both films delivered.

Given how many of my negative reviews include variations of the phrase, “This could have been shorter,” it’s no surprise that I enjoyed the anthology Lust Stories 2. Four short stories in 2 hours and 12 minutes? Sold! (Especially when Sujoy Ghosh and Konkona Sen Sharma are directing two of those stories.)

The biopic Tarla is another of the smaller family dramas that made the cut for its thoughtful portrayal of a couple navigating gender roles in 1970s India.

Though it looks like a war movie on the surface, Pippa is a family film of sorts as well. Ishaan Khattar, Mrunal Thakur, and Priyanshu Painyuli portray siblings who all play a role in their nation’s war efforts. The real tanks used in Pippa are very cool, as is the choreography in the song “Main Parwaana.”

I really enjoyed writer-director Arjun Varain Singh’s digital-age romance Kho Gaye Hum Kahan, which featured its own trio of standout young performers: Ananya Panday, Adarsh Gourav, and Siddhant Chaturvedi.

Of all of 2023’s blockbuster action flicks, Shak Rukh Khan’s Jawan was the wildest and most fun.

My favorite of the smaller relationship dramas is Three of Us — a gorgeously-shot gem about fading memories. Shefali Shah is pitch-perfect as a woman with early-onset dementia, and she’s supported with great performances from Swanand Kirkire and Jaideep Ahlawat.

2023 was Jaideep Ahlawat’s year, not just because of his role in Three of Us, but also for his performance in my favorite movie of the year: Jaane Jaan. Sujoy Ghosh directed my very favorite Hindi film, 2012’s Kahaani, so I was predisposed to like Jaane Jaan (and his Lust Stories 2 short “Sex with Ex”). But Jaane Jaan is Ghosh at his best. Like Kahaani, Jaane Jaan is another thriller about a woman with a problem that’s set in an evocative locale. This time, Kareena Kapoor Khan is the woman in trouble in a gloomy hill town, and Ahlawat plays her unlikely helper. The film is tense and exciting, and the performances totally sell it. Jaane Jaan is why I like movies.

Kathy’s Best Bollywood Movies of 2023

  1. Jaane Jaan — stream on Netflix
  2. Three of Us — stream on Netflix
  3. Jawan — stream on Netflix
  4. Kho Gaye Hum Kahan — stream on Netflix
  5. Pippa — stream on Amazon Prime
  6. Tarla — stream on Zee5
  7. Lust Stories 2 — stream on Netflix
  8. Rocky Aur Rani Kii Prem Kahaani — stream on Amazon Prime
  9. Tu Jhoothi Main Makkar — stream on Netflix
  10. Gulmohar — stream on Hulu

Previous Best Movies Lists

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Movie Review: Three of Us (2023)

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4 Stars (out of 4)

A woman diagnosed with early-onset dementia returns to an important place from her youth in the quiet, thoughtful drama Three of Us. It’s a gorgeous film that gives its characters all the time they need.

Shefali Shah plays the woman in question, Shailaja. She’s married to Dipankar (Swanand Kirkire), and their son is away at college. Shailaja’s increasing forgetfulness necessitates an early retirement from her government job processing paperwork for divorcing couples.

She asks Dipankar to take her to visit Vengurla, a small town on the Konkan coast where she attended school from fifth through eighth grade. It’s not a place she’s ever mentioned before, so he’s surprised by the request but obliges with a week-long trip.

Old classmates and teachers recognize Shailaja immediately, even though she’s been gone almost thirty years. Most importantly, her childhood sweetheart Pradeep (Jaideep Ahlawat) is still in town. He’s happy to see her and takes off work to guide the couple around the area.

Elements like Shailaja’s past reluctance to talk about Vengurla or the boy she left behind could easily be the setup for a thriller or romantic drama, but Three of Us isn’t that kind of movie. Pradeep introduces Shailaja and Dipankar to his wife and kids right away. Shailaja has her reasons for not dwelling on her time in Vengurla until it becomes clear that, someday, she won’t be able to remember those days at all.

Everyone in Three of Us is nice. The story is packed with emotion even though no one yells, deceives, or fights. The conflict is with a force that can’t be fought, as Shailaja’s memories slip away and as she and the people she love ready themselves for the changes that will bring.

Shah plays Shailaja with subtlety. When she loses her place or gets overwhelmed, she clams up and quietly retreats. If we didn’t know about her diagnosis, she might just seem shy. Ahlawat’s Pradeep is a steadying presence, which might have been why Shailaja liked him in the first place. Kirkire is the workmanlike hero of the film, playing Dibankar exactly like a guy who’s hanging around with his wife’s old classmates and feeling a bit like a third wheel should be played.

Throughout all, director Avinash Arun — who also co-wrote and served as director of photography on the film — resists rushing the characters, letting us observe them as they just exist. It’s soothing.

Arun made his name in the industry as a cinematographer, so it’s no surprise that Three of Us is stunning to look at. He knows how to perfectly frame shots, position the characters in space, and follow their movements. The natural scenery around Vengurla is breathtaking, but the built environment of a small town slowly decaying is melancholy and evocative as well.

As if this weren’t enough beauty, Arun includes a scene where Shailaja returns to the dance studio where she learned Bharatnatyam. The school’s current star pupil Manjiri (Payal Jadhav, the film’s choreographer) gives a jaw-droppingly beautiful performance that alone would make Three of Us worth watching. Add that to the sweet story and pitch-perfect performances, and you’ve got yourself a really charming little film.

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Movie Review: Dunki (2023)

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2 Stars (out of 4)

Filmmaker Rajkumar Hirani’s Dunki addresses the inhumanity of national borders and immigration policies that disproportionately punish the poor. In typical Hirani fashion, he uses humor to make the problem relatable, but the grim, visceral middle section of the story feels out of place.

Dunki begins with the same framing device Hirani used in 3 Idiots: three long-time pals set out to meet another friend they haven’t seen for many years. This time, the action begins in 2020 in London, as a grey-haired woman named Manu (Taapsee Pannu in old lady makeup) breaks out from the hospital. She holds her IV bag aloft as she navigates public transit in her hospital gown, a sequence that makes for great visual humor. Pannu is the film’s standout comic performer.

Manu meets her buddies Buggu (Vikram Kochhar) and Balli (Anil Grover), who are as eager as she is to return to their Punjabi hometown. But visas are tricky to come by, so they decide to contact the friend who helped them get out of India 25 years ago — Hardy (Shah Rukh Khan).

The action flashes back to 1995, when Buggu, Balli, and Manu hoped to solve their families’ financial problems by working in England. A thriving visa-fraud industry in town promises to help those without skills or money emigrate through dishonest means. Hardy arrives in town to repay a debt to Manu’s recently deceased brother and stays to help her.

The four enroll in an English language class of dubious repute led by Geetu (Boman Irani, who also played an educator in 3 Idiots). Vicky Kaushal has a lengthy cameo as a fellow student named Sukhi. There’s an extended comedy bit as the students think they’ve found a sneaky way to pass their official English exams without really learning much English. Some of it is quite funny, but like many of the bits in Dunki, it’s longer than it needs to be.

When conventional and unconventional methods fail to get them visas, Geetu proposes a third option: the dunki (“donkey”) method. This involves paying brokers to smuggle them over land into Turkey, then via shipping container across the sea to England. It’s illegal, expensive, and dangerous, but it’s their only option. Hardy joins them, hoping the skills he learned as a soldier will help them survive the journey.

This is where the film’s comic tone shifts to something darker. There are some gruesome deaths and an attempted sexual assault that make what had been a family-friendly movie into one requiring parental discretion. It seems like an attempt to do justice to the very real horrors faced by those migrating illegally, but the change is abrupt.

While Hirani deserves credit for shining a light on this global justice issue, his fictional narrative leaves something to be desired. The characters are indistinct and forgettable, and decades of their experience are absent from the story. The audience is only supposed to care about what the characters go through, not who they are, so Hirani doesn’t develop them as individuals.

This is Shah Rukh Khan’s first film with Hirani, who gets a classic performance out of the star. The film’s lone dance number “Lutt Putt Gaya” is enjoyable, although it would’ve been fun if Pannu played more of a part in it. Khan’s other 2023 releases were action thrillers, so this was a nice change of pace. It’s just too bad Dunki‘s screenplay wasn’t up to snuff.

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Movie Review: 12th Fail (2023)

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2 Stars (out of 4)

Watch 12th Fail on Hulu

Even though 12th Fail is based on the life of a real person, the film feels abstracted from its main character. The story contains a number of obstacles that can trip up viewers unfamiliar with the hiring processes of the Indian civil service.

Vikrant Massey plays Manoj Kumar Sharma, who grew up in a poor, rural village but studied and sacrificed to become a member of the Indian Police Service (IPS). Obviously, the movie doesn’t need to explain what the IPS is to Indian viewers, but it’s not made clear to outsiders how, say, an IPS officer differs from a DSP (Deputy Superintendent of Police). The film uses a lot of abbreviations that blur together for those not steeped in the shorthand.

The story begins in 1997 when Manoj is a teenager in Chambal. The area is known for its bandits, and the mayor runs the village on bribes and corruption. Newly transferred DSP Dushyant Singh (Priyanshu Chatterjee) arrests the school principal for encouraging students to cheat on their exams. Manoj is so inspired by the righteous DSP that he vows to study and become an IPS officer.

Even Manoj is surprised at just how labyrinthine the process to become an Indian civil servant is — and just how small the odds of success are. After passing high school, there are multiple exams: some multiple choice, some essay, including some in English. Students get four total attempts to pass the exams, and that’s it. If they pass their exams, they still have to clear a brutal final interview.

The process can take years to complete, which makes it hard for anyone who has to work while studying. Everyone who takes the tests pays for exam coaching, further weeding out many poor and working class applicants.

Manoj heads to the city of Gwailor to pursue coaching, only to be robbed before finding the coaching center shut down. He gets lucky when he meets Pritam Pandey (Anant V Joshi), another prospective student. Pritam’s family has money, so he takes Manoj with him to Delhi. The two stay friends even as Manoj works a series of low-wage jobs, studying into the wee hours of the night.

Writer-director Vidhu Vinod Chopra makes Pritam the narrator of Manoj’s story, which creates a distance between the audience and the main character. As the narrative proceeds, it becomes clear that the character Manoj portrays in the film is mostly a generic symbol of underprivileged test takers–and not an interesting character, himself. As Manoj’s lower caste friend Gauri (Anshumann Pushkar) says, “Even if one of us wins, the whole herd wins.” But if we don’t care about the one, it’s that much more difficult to be invested in the herd.

Despite featuring Manoj’s friends and eventual girlfriend Shraddha (Medha Shankar), it doesn’t feel like we get much insight into Manoj. He’s determination personified, but that’s about it. Massey’s performance in the lead role is solid.

In addition to the movie’s characterization issues, the studying and test-taking processes are shown in greater detail than is necessary, bogging down the pace.

The real Manoj’s accomplishments are inspirational, but 12th Fail itself is a bit dull.

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Movie Review: Animal (2023)

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0.5 Star (out of 4)

Watch Animal on Netflix

Animal is so unintentionally funny that it almost veers into So Bad It’s Good territory. Almost. An excess of pointless, gory violence and an unrelenting mean streak overshadow the film’s wackier elements, making it simply So Bad.

Ranbir Kapoor plays Vijay, a man obsessed with his emotionally distant father Balbir (Anil Kapoor). Since childhood, Vijay has assumed that he knows what’s best for everyone. His eagerness to use violence to prove that gets him sent away from the family more than once, further straining the relationship between father and son.

After college, mullet-sporting Vijay woos his childhood sweetheart Geetanjali (Rashmika Mandanna) by extolling the virtue of alpha males and telling her, “You have a big pelvis. You can accommodate healthy babies.” That Geetanjali is impressed by this red pill nonsense is one of the funniest parts of the movie.

Years later, Vijay, Geetanjali, and their kids return from America after Balbir is shot in a failed assassination attempt. Vijay replaces his dad’s security team with relatives from the family’s ancestral village. In truth, Vijay has enlisted his cousins to help him take revenge on the people who attacked Balbir.

Though Animal ostensibly takes place in the real world, the story is sheer fantasy. We know this because the structures that shape our society are absent. There are no police in Animal, and barely any mention of politics or government. Vijay kills hundreds of people in a single, publicly accessible place, and there is no reaction to it, let alone consequences. As much as I loathe cinematic storytelling that relies on news footage, the fact that no one seems to notice all the dead people feels odd. Balbir’s steel factory generates unlimited funds for Vijay’s vengeance, unmanaged and almost entirely off camera.

I say almost entirely because Vijay gives a televised speech at the factory promising to slit the throats of those who hurt his dad. If only CNBC was really that interesting.

See, Animal can’t be the realized dream of alpha male culture in a world with laws. The leading man must be able to exercise his will freely. He writes the rules, and everyone needs to fall in line or die. There are plenty of Hindi films where the male lead is the arbiter of reality, though few present such a bloody version of manly id unleashed. Usually it’s just a few extrajudicial killings by a divinely sanctioned cop (a la Singham), not gory mass slaughter and terrorism.

To be fair to Vijay, a lot of his killing is done in self-defense. The sequence in which Vijay chops through dozens of assailants with an axe while his cousins sing about how a Jatt is kicking ass is pretty cool. The rest of the fight scenes are less compelling, apart from the almost orgasmic reactions some men have to hand-to-hand combat. To call it homoerotic undersells it.

None of the women in the movie have any agency. All of them are threatened or humiliated by men. Geetanjali’s marriage makes her utterly miserable.

The actors truly commit to their parts in this goofy movie. Vijay likes to talk about urination and underwear, and Ranbir Kapoor delivers the lines with a straight face. Bobby Deol shows up late in the film to chew scenery, which he does with gusto. Somehow, Shakti Kapoor of Gunda fame plays the movie’s voice of reason as one of Balbir’s long-time friends.

The thing about a So Bad It’s Good classic like Gunda is that it’s fun. The violence is broken up with lighter moments, like when Mithun Chakraborthy tosses an infant to a monkey. Animal is weird, but not fun. Everyone is unhappy, including the anti-hero main character, and there’s no sense that things will be better when the violence stops.

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Movie Review: Tiger 3 (2023)

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2.5 Stars (out of 4)

Watch Tiger 3 on Amazon Prime

The latest entry in Salman Khan’s Tiger action franchise, Tiger 3, is in keeping with the two previous films, both in terms of quality and theme. What’s new is that the announcement of the YRF Spy Universe — which happened a few years after the second Tiger film, 2017’s Tiger Zinda Hai — means that Tiger 3 features a cameo by Shah Rukh Khan’s Pathaan and a preview of what’s next for Hrithik Roshan’s Kabir from War.

Tiger 3 picks up with the semi-rogue Indian spy Tiger (Khan) on a mission to rescue fellow RAW agent Gopi (Ranvir Shorey, from Ek Tha Tiger) in Afghanistan. With his dying breath, Gopi reveals that Tiger’s wife — semi-rogue Pakistani spy Zoya (Katrina Kaif) — is working with a terrorist outfit.

Tiger is surprisingly quick to believe his friend over his wife, but Gopi’s intel is partly correct. Zoya is being blackmailed by her former mentor and ex-deputy director of Pakistan’s intelligence agency, Aatish Rehman (Emraan Hashmi). Rehman has a vendetta against Tiger and Zoya, and he poisons their son Junior (Sartaaj Kakkar) to get them to do his bidding.

Pakistan’s Prime Minister Irani (Simran) has proposed demilitarization talks with India, and Rehman is determined to stop the talks and seize control of Pakistan’s government for himself. He forces Tiger and Zoya to steal nuclear codes in exchange for the antidote for Junior. The married spies are rendered traitors in the eyes of the nations they love.

The screenplay relies heavily on news broadcasts to convey information, so seemingly everyone around the globe knows secret agent Tiger’s identity. This is extra weird since it’s very easy to disguise one’s self in this world. Zoya fist-fights Tiger while he’s dressed like a roadie for Lynyrd Skynyrd, and she doesn’t recognize him until he pulls off his fake beard.

As in previous Tiger films, Zoya’s action scenes are the highlights. This includes the bathhouse towel fight sequence that featured prominently in the movie’s trailer. In the film, the bathhouse scene is intercut with shots of Tiger rappelling down a clock tower, which blunts some of the effect of the towel fight (perhaps deliberately — the franchise is named after Tiger, not Zoya, after all).

Tiger’s action scenes are fine, but they lack the dynamism that Kaif brings to Zoya. Further, the cameo by Shah Rukh Khan’s wisecracking Pathaan emphasizes just how little there is to Tiger’s personality. This is a franchise that relies on the audience’s pre-existing affection for the leading man.

As in Tiger Zinda Hai, Junior exists when the plot needs him to, then disappears. Tiger 3 even introduces another surrogate son character in the second half of the film who likewise appears on-screen until his plot utility runs out.

What Tiger 3 does have going for it that earlier films didn’t is a compelling villain in Aatish Rehman, played with great presence by Hashmi. Rehman puts Tiger and Zoya in seemingly impossible situations, keeping the tension high throughout.

Perhaps the biggest selling point of the Tiger franchise is its dedication to the idea that peace between India and Pakistan is a worthwhile goal. Across all three movies, Tiger, Zoya, and their teams work together to save lives and prevent war. It’s a welcome respite from the violent nationalism that pervades so many Hindi action films these days.

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Movie Review: Kho Gaye Hum Kahan (2023)

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3.5 Stars (out of 4)

Watch Kho Gaye Hum Kahan on Netflix

Kho Gaye Hum Kahan thoughtfully explores relationship challenges in the age of social media. Debutant writer-director Arjun Varain Singh integrates smartphones into the lives of his characters organically, emphasizing their importance without letting the tech overshadow the humans at the heart of the story.

Three Mumbai twentysomethings have been best friends forever. Imaad (Siddhant Chaturvedi) can afford to pursue his dream of being a stand-up comedian, thanks to his rich dad (played by Rahul Vohra). Corporate consultant Ahana (Ananya Panday) shares an apartment with Imaad but is dating Rohan (Rohan Gurbaxani). Personal trainer Neil (Adarsh Gourav) lives with his working-class parents and wants to open his own gym.

Their love lives are rocky. Rohan asks Ahana to take a break but immediately posts suspicious cupcake photos to his Instagram and likes posts by a beautiful baking influencer. Neil is hooking up with another influencer named Lala (Anya Singh), who’s also one of his personal training clients — although Neil is convinced their relationship is more exclusive than it is. Imaad uses a fake name to meet women on Tinder, then ghosts them after they have sex.

Imaad’s romantic fortunes change when he meets Simran (Kalki Koechlin), a photographer working on an exhibition about Tinder users. She’s older and more mature than Imaad is, yet they have enough fun together for them to consider committing to one another.

Meanwhile, Neil is increasingly angry at Lala’s refusal to make their relationship public and for her flirting with a potential advertiser. Ahana posts racy photos to her own Instagram account in order to get Rohan’s attention. It works.

The trio also decide to go into business together and make Neil’s dream of owning a gym a reality. Ahana quits her dead-end office job to focus on a business strategy, and Imaad invests the money — although his dad warns him that money isn’t the only thing that can be lost when you start a company with your friends.

While the characters’ relationship problems aren’t new, Director Singh skillfully shows how constant access to social media adds a fresh layer of complexity to them. Smartphones have only been around for an eye-blink of human history, and it’s unreasonable to expect us as a species to immediately adapt individually and culturally to the profound emotional consequences of such technological advancement. Singh’s screenplay — which was co-written with Zoya Akhtar, Reema Kagti, and Yash Sahai — offers a comprehensive snapshot of this moment in history for Generation Z.

The only real complaint about the writing is Imaad’s stand-up comedy material. Stand-up routines within movies are often uncomfortable to watch, and none of the writers are themselves comedians. That said, Imaad’s material sounds amateurish enough to befit his status as a comic who hasn’t hit it big yet. Chaturvedi does reasonably well given the challenge of performing the sometimes awkward material he’s given.

Neil is the most volatile of the main characters, and Gourav plays him within the perfect emotional range. When Neil takes revenge via social media, it reinforces the technological themes in Singh’s story.

Panday is so natural as Ahana that she disappears into the role, delivering a subtle and wholly believable performance. This should erase any doubts for those still skeptical of Panday’s abilities.

Kho Gaye Hum Kahan puts a modern spin on the classic problems of young adulthood. I’m excited to see what Arjun Varian Singh does next.

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Streaming Video News: December 22, 2023

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I updated my list of Bollywood movies on Netflix with today’s premiere of the Netflix Original Malayalam documentary Curry & Cyanide: The Jolly Joseph Case. Yesterday was busy, with the additions of Aadi Keshava (Telugu), Kuiko (Tamil), and Sajini Shinde Ka Viral Video (Hindi).

I also updated my list of Bollywood movies on Amazon Prime with the premiere of the Amazon Original Hindi film Dry Day. The Tamil flick 80s Buildup was added as well.

I’m taking much of the rest of 2023 off, but there are a lot of Hindi films hitting streaming in the days to come. Here’s what to look forward to (note that titles on Amazon Prime and Zee5 may be available in the United States the day before):

December 26 — Kho Gaye Hum Kahan on Netflix
December 28 — Shastry Virudh Shastry and Three of Us on Netflix; 12th Fail on Hulu
December 29 — Dono, Once Upon Two Times, & Safed on Zee5; Wedding.con, Season 1 on Prime

If you really, really want to plan ahead for the future, I wrote a massive preview of all of the new Indian Original series and movies coming to Netflix in 2024 and beyond for What’s on Netflix. It was quite the undertaking, but I’m pleased with the results.

Thanks again for another wonderful year at Access Bollywood — and special thanks to everyone who donated via PayPal and Venmo! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! — Kathy

[Disclaimer: my Amazon links include an affiliate tag, and I may earn a commission on purchases made via those links. Thanks for helping to support this website!]

Movie Review: The Archies (2023)

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2 Stars (out of 4)

Watch The Archies on Netflix

One of Netflix’s most highly anticipated Original films turned out to be one of its most underwhelming. Much of the hype leading up to the release of The Archies had to do with its cast of newcomers, some from prominent Bollywood families. None of them are at fault for the film’s problems, which are rather due to uncharacteristic missteps by the film’s writer-director, Zoya Akhtar.

Based on the Archie comic books, the movie takes place in 1964 in the fictional Anglo-Indian hill town of Riverdale, India. The story is centered around the town’s teenagers, including Archie (Agastya Nanda, Amitabh Bachchan’s grandson), his neighbor Betty (Khushi Kapoor, Sridevi’s daughter), her best friend Veronica (Suhana Khan, Shah Rukh Khan’s daughter), and their pals Reggie (Vedang Raina), Jughead (Mihir Ahuja), Ethel (Aditi Saigal, aka “Dot”), and Dilton (Yuvraj Menda).

There are various romantic entanglements and crushes within the group, the most chaotic of which is Archie’s fondness for both Betty and Veronica. Those complications get pushed aside when Veronica’s wealthy father Hal (Satyajit Sharma) pressures the town council to let him build a hotel in the middle of Green Park: a place important to Riverdale’s young people. Archie and friends get a quick education in political organizing and band together to save the park.

When the story focuses on the teens, it’s pretty entertaining, if mostly surface level. Mihir Ahuja as Jughead is the only one with prior acting experience, and his performance is the most assured. The rest of the young actors show promise, particularly Suhana Khan’s dancing and Khushi Kapoor’s attentiveness toward her fellow performers during scenes.

Things slow down when the adults get involved, sapping the dynamism from the film. The teens are absent from a lot of these scenes, shining a spotlight on their expository nature. Was there no better way to convey information than via grownups sitting around talking?

The slow periods stand out because The Archies is structured more like musical theater than a typical “Bollywood” movie. Many of the songs flow out of conversations and have lyrics that are literal rather than metaphorical. You can sense how scenes would physically transition from one to another were this to be turned into a stage musical. Even in this movie version, the scenes with adults talking need to feel just long enough to allow for a set change to happen in the background, and no longer.

Considering that The Archies is a musical, it’s unfortunate that its songs are so forgettable. “Sunoh” and “Va Va Voom” — the two tunes Netflix used in their promotions for the film — are the best of the lot. Instead of using an upbeat number during a rally for the park, Akhtar uses the ballad “Yeh Saari Aawazein.” Betty periodically sings some of her diary entries, but the performance style is too contemporary and feels out of place.

The disappointing quality of the songs is countered by novel, entertaining choreography. There’s something going on in every corner of the screen in the tune “Everything Is Politics.” “Dhishoom Dhishoom” is danced entirely on roller skates. On top of that, the film’s styling and costuming is top-notch.

Good elements like choreography and costume design can’t counterbalance the film’s structural issues and overall underwhelming vibe, unfortunately. Akhtar’s vision for The Archies is interesting, but the execution isn’t up to her usual high standards.

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